I decided to do a Q & A since a lot of you are asking outside sources about my situation. The most obvious question, and the one that keeps circulating...
"Does she plan on staying with him" I just posted a TikTok answering this question, but for those of you who don't follow me I figured I'd clarify here. John was sentenced in April to 18 years to life. Although I have NO idea what the future holds for us, I do know it includes him. When my kids father left in 2006, I spent 13 years alone. I know it seems unrealistic to wait on someone for 18 years but if you truly love and care about someone you aren't going to leave in their darkest hour. John and I have a special relationship. One minute we're cold, the next we're hot. It's not ideal for everyone, but our love is unique, and we adore each other. I don't care how long it takes I will advocate and fight for him until I have nothing left to fight. The thing about me, I go hard for the people I love.
2. "How is she"
I appreciate the concerns, truly I do. If you are genuinely wondering how I am, what's the harm in asking me? I don't care if we don't talk, or I know you through a friend of a friend. Ask me. This is my least favorite question as it brings up a lot of emotions for me. Best I can offer is I am okay. I'm not happy, sad, angry, or hurt. I'm numb and I'm okay with that. I don't want sympathy, I want awareness. I want people to know it's okay to feel "numb". For me, it's not a bad a thing. I just genuinely do the best I can each day and wake up the next expecting something different. When it repeats, I'm okay with that. Life isn't horrible right now, it's not peachy either but it could always be worse.
3. "But he shot in the back"
That is correct, John fired when the man hesitated on whether or not he was done with his beating. I did some extensive research on this "rule". While every situation is different, shotting in the back is not "illegal". In the 80's there was a 21-foot rule for officers using deadly force. It basically allowed an officer to pull the trigger if the suspect was within 21-feet of them, but if they were further away and the officer pulled his life was no longer in imminent danger. Why does that rule no apply to civilians? Is there life not worth the same? The 21-foot rule no longer exist. This is my biggest issue when the state presented the evidence of John shotting in the back.
a. there was no crime scene reenactment.
b. no measurements on length
c. no trajectory analysis
Although the footage shows the individual running away, the state failed to provide KEY factors on length and timing. What you see in the news isn't always accurate in real life. I've studied the video religiously. I can stop it on the precise time of when John pulled the trigger and where the individual was. The individual was 8 feet away with half his body turned when John shot. 8 feet might still sound far away to you guys but imagine a 6'3 long legged individual running. Those 8 feet have now turned into 1.5 leaps away. You are also waking up from a 14 second beating, and took 17 forceful blows to the head, ears, and frontal lobe. Action is faster than reaction, and that's what John did after 17 blows to the head. He had 0.8 seconds to react.
I am not debating whether or not John pulled the trigger. It's obvious from the video. I am trying to educate everyone on self-defense issues.
We had an expert witness testify and, in his report, he said, "if this was a police shooting it would be a justified shooting", but the Judge ruled in favor of the State and excluded that from trial. Seems fair, huh?
"Since action is faster than reaction, someone can be facing you, then turn away, faster than you can pull the trigger. In the time it takes for you to process this in a high stress situation while shooting, it’s totally possible that you might hit them in the back. It doesn’t mean it’s wrong; it just means there was a time delay.
In defensive gun use this absolutely does happen on occasion and has been ruled excused or justified by judges and juries".
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I can go on and on, but this was supposed to be a quick post today. Hopefully I've answered your questions, but if you have more you can always reach out to me. My face is way worse than my bite. =)
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